Jay Z vs Denver Water is the New Biggie vs Tupac

Batten down the hatches, and start wearing your neutrals – we’ve got a street war brewing.

As many of you know, Jay Z has recently found himself in deep water after his music streaming service, Tidal, flopped. The service was meant to provide listeners with a premium streaming experience, complete with exclusive releases, while also focusing on paying the musicians a fair share as opposed to the current nickle and dime payouts.

“The challenge is to get everyone to respect music again, to recognize its value. Water is free. Music is $6 but no one wants to pay for music. You should drink free water from the tap — it’s a beautiful thing. And if you want to hear the most beautiful song, then support the artist.” – Jay Z

Conceptually, it’s a win/win, but Hova used top tier mega stars like Niki Minaj, and Kanye West to promote the platform, causing the whole thing to look like a group of the hottest pop stars begging for more money.

Jay stepped down as CEO of Tidal weeks later, but it seems his comments on H2O didn’t go unnoticed. An employee of Denver Water, Steve Snyder, took the words to heart, and responded with an open letter.

In what will surely be regarded as the diss track of the year, Snyder sympathizes with musicians struggling with how the public values music, but puts Young Hov in his place in regards to the water business. Steve playfully takes a look at Jay Z’s album sales, business ventures, and income, then compares those numbers to how much the water company would be providing if it were to take in that kind of cash. Snyder then goes in for the kill with a poignant moment of clarity:

“Of course, that light-hearted analogy overlooks a very real problem. All the money in the world can’t help when water becomes scarce. Just look at these impacts of California’s current drought. Californians would no doubt pay good money for Mother Nature to turn on her faucet a little more frequently.” – Steve Snyder

While the letter is certainly tongue-in-cheek, the point is painfully clear – Jay Z is wet behind the ears when it comes to understanding businesses other than his own.